OZZY

Millions of people, living I suppose. As the Dad. John Michael.

It's not abnormal to me the way I live. Please don't scream. Just calm fucking down.

We've got a tickling stick. It's a horrible idea. Smack him in the head. Shut the fuck up. It's going to kill you. It's on the ground. Stop screaming.

Sharon is the leader. I don't want to taste it. Taste. You're winding me up. Do you like it? Fucking crap. Fucking horrible. You lying cunt. Be rigorously honest. Stop it. I'll kick you all out.

Dad went to jail. I didn't try to kill your mom. You can't shit on boats. You're gonna go two weeks on an ocean liner without taking a shit? What, who, when?

I bit several creatures' heads off. Rifles and knives. Because you fucking shot me. You're an idiot. It went through my fucking leg. Up, now. Right now.

Make me dinner. Be a mother. Let me help you, please. I'm going to piss myself. Fuck you, no way. She wants her tits to do that. Oh, God. You're fucking disgusting. Talking to my fucking self. I tend to stammer.

Heavy metal rules. I'm not proud of being dyslexic. I'm a real guy with real feelings. It could be worse. I could be Sting.

Turn that thing off, it's driving me mad. NO! If you have sex, wear a condom. My vagina. I fucking hate Christmas. Fuck off. Fucking cat.

Sharon! Bubbles! I'm the Prince of Fucking Darkness! Dad! You're all fucking mad. What the fuck do you want me to do?

Now fuck off. I love it.

Stop screaming.